On my heart …

When the same ‘thought’ keeps popping up from different places over several weeks … you start to listen. Or hopefully you start to listen.

This verse keeps coming to mind …

Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves.
(Phil. 2:3, ESV)



And then it came up in a sermon at church. (Okay Lord, I’m hearing it.)


I wanted to share it because I feel like as a ‘stay-at-home’ mom … a wife … a handmade business owner … a creative being … a friend … a sister/daughter … a girl … it is SO easy to fall into the trap of comparing ourselves with others. And when you start comparing, up come the feelings of jealousy and envy. A rivalry starts whether you realize it or not.


I enjoy … like really enjoy … reading blogs of other women in my same stage of life. Women I can relate to and feel like I share some connection with. But what I find is that if I am not careful to guard my heart and mind, I can start feeling like it’s me verses them. Jealous of how many followers a blog has. Envious of how beautiful a blog looks. A sense of rivalry as I watch a handmade shop’s sells rise while mine might be stagnant.


Am I alone? Gosh I hope not … because I don’t know what that says about me ;). But, I strongly suspect that we all suffer with this … 


After all, if we didn’t, would God have needed to write it down for us?!? 


So, this week, I’m going to make a little visual reminder for my desk (right next to my computer … where I read blogs) that I need to ‘worry about me’ and no one else :). I need to trust in God’s plan for ME and not worry about His plan for someone else. I need to think and focus on what inspires ME right now and then create from that place. I need to think of others before myself.


Because really … aren’t we most satisfied when we’re content with ourselves? When we’re creating from the inspiration that moves us (and not what we think will sell) and we share that with others? That is infectious … really. And if you aren’t being true to you then I don’t think you’ll ever find that contentment … and ultimately whatever it is you’re doing it won’t give you fulfillment. And then, what’s the point?


As soon as I make my little sign I’ll share it on here … so you can download one for your desk … just in case anyone else struggles with this ;).


Happy Creating!

Comments

  1. I really needed this reminder today. Thanks so much for sharing.

  2. I love this!! Almost every week I am looking at followers and layouts more than just the content of blogs I love [especially ones about homes/interiors like mine]. It’s nearly impossible not too, but I have to remind myself that I am different and that I cannot compare. I don’t have the time & it’s not worth the effort. I made myself a similar sign :)

  3. Wow, talk about nudgings…. I have been struggling with this very thing for quite some time. And the more I struggle with it the more the Lord convicts me!! And then I was convinced no one else was struggling with the very same thing. Thank you for being honest and up front! It did my heart good and was once again an affirmation that I am not alone in this struggle. Isn’t God so good!?! :)

  4. I think we all struggle with this. If it makes you feel better there are people out there jealous of YOUR sales and YOUR followers. I think it’s a natural way our brains tend to go, but it can be very difficult to keep it all in perspective. I think you do fabulous, by the way :)

  5. You just hit the nail on the head!! Especially for me, I am relatively new to the blog world and I have also found myself being envious and that is not at all why I started blogging and posting my creations. Thanks for the reminder can’t wait to see/download the reminder that you come up with. I love your blog and am a faithful follower. Your Sister in Christ.

  6. This is beautifully said. I struggle with the same things, and just like Bethany said before me, I think your blog/shop goodies are wonderful. Yours is one of the first I started reading a few months ago when I began my blog. Thank you for the verse, and I will definitely be waiting for your sign. Have a blessed day!

  7. Just like you have noticed this topic coming up in several different ways, reading your blog today was the icing on my cake. I totally know what your saying and even said out loud as I was reading…yes, I know…yes, your so right. Thank you for your words and your heart.

    alison

  8. Well written and definitely from the heart. We wouldn’t be human if we ALL didn’t feel this way from time to time.

    It wasn’t long ago that I stopped reading certain blogs or visiting the shops that made me feel this way. I needed to not get caught up in the drama I was creating in my head. I began to feel much better when I focused on myself, my goals and my life.

    I really appreciate you sharing this, it is a reminder that no matter what people appear to be (what we think they are), we all go through similar situations.

    Another thing on appearance, what people write/say about their lives isn’t always true. I have know people to create a fantasy of a happy life online when their lives were actually in shambles.

    ~Patricia

  9. This really hit home for me. Thanks so much for sharing. I totally get what you’re saying about being envious of other bloggers layouts, followers, content, etc. I, too, learned that I’m happiest when I’m creating whatever I’m in the mood to create, but my sister just bought a beautiful new house and while I’m really happy for her, I’m also super jealous. Thanks for helping me get over that.

  10. I can definitely relate. it’s very easy to see what other people have and want it when what i really need to do is count my own blessings, of which i have many. thanks for the reminder.

  11. Just so you know! I totally envy you! I’ve watched your sales, the success of your shop, your blog. There are a handful of crafter/sewer/bloggers out there that have celebrity status in my mind and you are one of them! I have a lickety split bag and a list taker that you made and I won in a giveaway about a year and a half ago and I use and treasure those items :) YOU are amazing!

  12. I agree with you, that is probably the biggest reason that I stopped looking at facebook. I used to have lots of those feelings after reading all of the wonderful things other people were doing….

  13. You are fabulous. Truly fabulous. I can’t wait to see your sign. A while ago I heard a message that in comparison everyone loses. Either we diminish our own worth or the worth of others. I try to remember that. Not always. But I’m working on it.

  14. Well said! I also enjoy reading blogs about sewing and crafting, but on occasion, I start beating myself up with questions like, “Why can’t I be as productive, talented, artistic…” Then I have to remind myself that all these bloggers are kind enough to share their talent and art — I shouldn’t make it about ME!!

  15. You are not alone!! I’ve been struggling with this very thing! Thanks you so much for your thoughts today. It has helped me tremendously! I have the following quote posted on my desktop.

    “Remember, this is not a competition. If your art makes you feel even a bit better at the end, you’ve won. You’re reward is your happiness.” This was in an interview with Karen Grunbery.

  16. You are definitely not alone! I feel the same way myself and beat myself up constantly about my own blog and how lacking it is, so few followers etc. But you are so right – I have to worry about me and I can’t wait to see your sign – print it off and place it where I can see it. I love your blog and have only just discovered it – lucky for me.

  17. This is sooo true! I have been praying about how to start up my own at home sewing business for some time now. I always seem to look at others (including you :) ) and wondering why I can’t completely stay at home and not have to “work” even part time and sew to amke money! I have been trying to think of what I want to make and what I can do to make it mine own and help set me apart from other sellers. It seems just as soon as I think I ahve a great idea, I see someone else already selling it. Like when I thought a cute embroidered patch on a camera strap would be sooo fun….days before your blog post :) At least I know others have the same taste as me :) Thanks for the verse and I will try to remember it while I am praying for direction!

  18. Beautifully said. So important to remember. I do what I do to bring glory to the Lord for the gifts he’s given to me, not for any other reason! Thank you for the heartfelt reminder.

  19. Thank you for sharing this verse & your heart! I too struggle with this! I feel like, as women, it’s such an easy trap to get caught in.

  20. Oh, Andrea. I am right there with ya, sister! My husband and I were just talking about this last night. He thinks blogs are from the devil – Ha. : ) No, not really but he does think they make us ‘want’ a lot.

    If we do not guard ourselves from this, it creeps right in and we don’t even realize until we already feel bad comparing ourselves to someone else’s “perfect” life! I love these thoughts and it is good to keep this in mind constantly! Thank you.

  21. Oh Andrea, you are SO talented and I wish I could create and sew like you. I have been struggling with the same feelings the past month. Not many people will admit it, but blogging is very competitive. But it shouldn’t be. I often find myself doubting my own decor and ideas when I see fabulous blogs with great pottery barn and crate and barrel furniture everywhere. There homes just looks so gorgeous, and ours looks nothing like them. But then I have to keep it real and be thankful to God for all that He has provided. Our house may not look like a magazine, but I try my best to love what we have.

    So anyway, great post girl. Sometimes I really do just shut the computer and not look at any blogs if I’m feeling pity on myself. :)

    It is hard to see people pass you up in followers stats, etc. You want to be happy for them, and you are, but what’s the other part of you saying? Seriously, that’s not what blogging is about! I hate that it has that rap.

    Ok I could go on and on. Just know you are definitely NOT alone. I’ll hush now. :)

  22. Thank you for sharing your thoughts and making it public. Means you really mean it and long for accountability. I appreciated hearing this message too.

  23. Andrea, this is such a fantastic post. I think we ALL feel that way. Maybe it is a woman thing? I think it stems from something good, we all want to better ourselves, the important thing is to remember what makes each of us special. Easier said than done, I know, but I try to remind myself of that every time I start to wish I could do this like that person, or had that like somebody else.

    Keep being YOU, because you are amazing! (btw, I have your strap on my keychain, and each time I dig it out of my diaper bag, I think of you. I love it!)

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